It is approaching the end of 2018 already.

At this time of year, I like to reflect.

Self-reflecting helps you to look at what you have carried out so far.

Thought provoking questioning goes round and round in my head.

These are some of the questions I have asked myself over the last few weeks.

Image result for question mark

What have I accomplished?

What have I not accomplished?

How can I do things differently to produce different results?

What else do I want to work on?

How will I go about doing that?

How will I navigate the challenges?

Personal development helps you to make improvements in your life.

Creating an action plan is all part of the personal development process.

Remember personal development is a lifelong process.

Four benefits to personal development.

  1. You will be able to make crystal clear goals
  2. You will be motivated
  3. You will have a better work-life balance
  4. It will improve your prospects

What areas do you want to work on?

Do you have a personal development plan?

Why not work on it TODAY!

Thank you for stopping by

Tarnya Coley- Author of Open Doors




The ART of effective communication.

Have you ever thought about how you communicate to others?

The art of communication is important because you want to get a message across.

How we speak to others is essential.



Think about what you are going to say before you speak. You want to ensure that what you are communicating comes across in the correct manner. Misunderstanding can lead to confusion. So make sure that what you communicate, others clearly understand.


Are you REALLY listening?

Or are you just smiling occasionally depending on the conversation?

Nodding and saying ‘ummmm’ when you think it appropriate, is NOT effective communication.

Active listening is hearing what is said. It is about asking questions, and genuinely being interested in what is being communicated.

Ask questions to clarify what the individual is saying.

80% of communication is our BODY LANGUAGE.


Be careful of your facial expressions, they can communicate how you REALLY feel, and you do not even realise it.

Eye contact is key, it lets the individual know that you are listening. It also shows that you are interested in what they are saying.

As you go through out your day think:

  • Am I conveying the correct message?
  • Am I communicating in the right way?

Practice the ART of communication today!

Thank you for stopping by.

Tarnya Coley- Author of the up-and-coming book- OPEN DOORS

Have a PLAN, have a PURPOSE.

Sometimes I have carried something out without it having a PURPOSE.

I think to myself, why did I do that?

Who did it benefit?

Was there a purpose to it?

Was that a waste of time. Time that I will NEVER get back.


Over this next week I have a number of tasks that I need to complete by the end of next week.

I have written my plans down, then given myself a timescale. Each day, I am working towards my plans. Having a plan is important as it gives you direction in what you need to do in order to accomplish the tasks.

A question I often ask myself, who do I need to support me in the various tasks?

It is so important to have people to support you.

Connect with someone, no texting, no FB, no whatsapp. Call that friend, visit that family member. They can be a great source of encouragement.

Having the right connection and support helps you to achieve and fulfil your plans. As the saying goes, two heads are better than one.


I have written down my plans, and I have put them in priority order:

  1. URGENT!
  3. NOT SO IMPORTANT, but needs to be completed.

Great, I can now work on the very important things first. Then tick them off when they have been completed. I love ticking things off my list as it gives me a sense of achievement.

Most importantly, do my plans have a purpose. YES! Also, who do my plans benefit? Is just to benefit me? If so I have misunderstood my purpose. Life is about impacting and making a difference in other peoples lives.

If I do not carry out these plans, I will not be able to move forward in fulfilling my dreams. Then I will be at a stand still and become frustrated.

According to Ashton Applewhite, having a purpose impacts your brain in a BIG way.

Do you have a PLAN? Does your plans have a PURPOSE?

I will add, who does your plan BENEFIT?

What action are you going to take today to ensure that you have a PLAN? Do not forget that carrying out the plan is important. Also think, does my plan have a PURPOSE? Who my plan BENEFIT?

Thank you for stopping by.

Tarnya Coley- Author of an up-and-coming book 2018

I get knocked down but I get UP AGAIN.

Reflecting on the teacher conference I attended yesterday, there were some insightful messages that was being spoken.

Over the last twenty years Christine Clark has worked with organisations to enhance personal resilience for managers and employees.

Resilience is what allows some people to be knocked down by life and come back stronger than ever. Rather than letting failure overcome them and drain their resolve, they find a way to rise from the ashes.

How do your build resilience?

  1. Find a sense of purpose.
  2. Build positive beliefs in your attitudes.
  3. Develop a strong social network.
  4. Embrace change.
  5. Be optimistic.
  6. Nurture yourself.
  7. Develop problem solving skills.
  8. Establish goals.
  9. Take steps to solve problems.
  10. Keep working on your skills.

Kenneth Ginsberg talks about the 7cs of RESILIENCE.

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Build your resilience- it may take time to build. Don’t give up- focus on practising the common characteristics. We all have the strength inside of us- just keep building on it.

Thank you for stopping by.

Tarnya Coley- Author of an up-and-coming book- 2018




In 2017 I was gliding through life. Doing the usual activities.
Getting up and getting ready for work.
Getting the children up for school
Preparing the sandwiches, and make them for hubby too.
Drop the children to school.
Go to work.
Go home….
I think you get the picture.
I wasn’t working hard on my goals. I wasn’t pursing them. When I did work on them, I would make very tiny steps. By the end of the year, surprise, surprise, I did not make much progress.
But, Jan the 1st 2018, I made a decision to GET UP and GO after my dreams. I am glad I had decided to make that choice.
Since I made that decision, I have made so much progress towards my goals. It is only Feb 14th, and their have been so many doors of opportunity. I am so surprised that things are moving at a rapid pace.

When I decided to take that initial first step, I noticed so many people wanting to support me with my goals. Wow, I feel so blessed. This is a very exciting time, 2018 is the year when you will see those dream come true. Remember you have to make steps towards your goals/ dreams. It will NOT just happen.

I will share with you how I made progress this year.
It all started with me making a decision that I am going to pursue my goals.
I have always been told that I should write a book. I thought about it, then that thought went very quickly. Then on the 1st Jan 2018, I decided that I will go for it. I have not stopped writing since the start of the year.
Guess what? on the 9th Feb, I completed my book. It is an inspirational true story. My life, my journey.  I write about how I overcome rejection, low self-esteem, and many other challenges. I had to go on a journey of healing, and through that process I found my true worth.
I wrote my book whilst working full time, in a very demanding job. I’m a lecturer. Mother of two, My daughter is 15 and leaving school this year. My son is 11 and going to high school in September. I also work for a voluntary organisation during the week. I have been stretched to capacity, but I was on a mission, a mission to make it happen. No one was going to do it for me.
My book is being proof read as we speak by several people.
A designer is doing the art work for the front cover.
Someone else is designing a website for me.
AND I am booking the venue today, I am having a Pre Book Launch. How exciting!!
Things starting moving when I decided to take action.
Word for today.
ACT– Take Action and do something!
Click on my video below, it is a short clip about my new project. You can subscribe to the Youtube channel. I will be posting motivational messages each week, and keeping the viewers posted about my progress towards my goals.
Thank you for stopping by.
Tarnya Coley- Author of an up-and-coming book 2018

My life, my journey


I woke up today feeling inspired. It’s Monday morning, getting ready for the day ahead. I have a great big smile on my face, a bounce in my step. Today is going to be a GOOD day.

Positive mental attitude.

What are you facing today? Remember it is about your attitude towards the things you are going to face.

Do NOT roll over in bed and grab that duvet.

Do NOT press snooze.

Do NOT say ‘I hate Monday’s.’

Get UP, get READY and GO for it.

Have a positive attitude in everything you do.

Have a plan for the rest of your day.

If it’s not working, change the method, but DO NOT change the goals.

I love playing scrabble, I receive a Word of the day every day on my phone.

So, a word for the day is POSITIVITY.

Remember there is POWER in POSITIVITY.

Have a great day.

Thank you for stopping by.

Author of an up-and-coming book 2018.



I will PURSUE excellence in everything I do
I will be UNDEFEATED and fight, I am a CHAMPION.
I will STAY FOCUSED and block out every distraction.
I will HOLD on and grasp tightly.
I will advance and move forward.
I will not allow the negative to overcast my mind
I will stay positive.
I will not give up.
I will not quit.

Make a DECLARATION today. Despite what you are going through. The hardship, the disappointment, the hurt and the pain, or whatever it is that may come your way.
Pursue. Undefeated. Stay focused. Hold on!

This is my DECLARATION..
Thank you for stopping by
Tarnya Coley Author of the up-and-coming book Closed Doors?